Beware Greeks bearing gifts - especially when it's billionaire Demosthenes Skouratis selling the biggest pleasure cruise ship ever built to the United Nations for their headquarters. CHEAP! Over three times the size of the QE II, this huge vessel has everything from high tech offices and communications equipment to luxury spas, casinos, restaurants and palatial apartments. But the deal doesn't include a dozen dead bodies and a hull full of bombs being rigged to explode the night of the opening gala! And Remo Williams, the Destroyer, plans to crash the party. Tipped off the plot when CURE director Harry Smith is getting beaten up by some tough crew members, Remo and Sinanju master Chiun blast full steam ahead, drowning the sleazy rats and save the UN from a watery grave.
And now, from the great folks who brought you Pearl Harbor...
Nemuro Nishitsu remembered Pearl Harbor. He also remembered the rest of World War II and Japan's humiliating defeat. Nishitsu had been a humble soldier then. He was Japan's number one industrialist now. And he had the money, the power, and the madness to script a sneak attack that made Pearl Harbor look like a childish prank...made in the U.S.A. a pitiful helpless giant...and made Remo and Chiun the country's last vanishing hope...as the flag of foreign conquest was planted in the American heartland, and the Destroyer was X-ed out of the action...
Chiun knows a secret and he isn't even telling Remo, the Destroyer, whom he has taught all his skills and loves as a son, because America has committed a sin against him he cannot pardon. They are in Africa, where feuds that have smoldered over centuries are being resolved by death and massacre. But how many deaths? And why? The facts are bizarre. In a Baltimore cemetery a white woman of aristocratic birth, who had died as a slave in Africa many years ago, is supposed to lie buried. But it is not her body in the coffin - and that can spark an international incident. It's going to get hotter in Africa. America's future seems dark indeed - and only Remo, the Destroyer, can bring back the light.
Was this the way America ended-Not with a bang but a fizzle?
The Russians who invented it called it the Sword of Damocles-a device that silently sterilized men and women alike. And now the Sword was in the worst possible hands - the out-of-whack android named Mr. Gordons that had returned from outer space to wreak revenge on those who had sent it there. Remo. Chiun. And the entire U.S. population. America was heading for a fate worse than death unless, Remo, Chiun and an untrustworthy, supersexy Soviet superspy could defeat this cybernaut chameleon that could destroy and attack with ease....
The entire U.S. army is being forced to wage war on its own people by a pontificating ten-preacher and the blonde Venus traveling as his wife. But, saints be praised, Remo and Chiun are of a different persuasion, and their unorthodox tactics leave many a zombie-eyed Christian soldier prostrate on the ground. Chaplains are dying left and right . . . an army base appears out of nowhere those answers to a higher authority than even the Pentagon. Agents of CURE postulate that a Mideast power may have created these apocalyptic events, but the facts are cloistered in secrecy. When Remo and Chiun look for answers, there's no room for sacred cows - and that's the gospel truth!
The President of Scambia's life is in danger when one sleezy goon schemes to assassinate not only a leader, but immobilize and destroy the entire country and transform its peaceful society into a thundering safe haven for international hoods. Master Chiun and his protégé Remo Williams descend on the scene to combat the treacherous plot...but not without a fight.
The bad news was that the U.S. President was shot down over Mexico. The good news was that he survived. The bad news was he was captured by drug thugs. The good news was he was rescued by his courageous Vice-President.
But the worst news was that the Vice-President was definitely not as heroic as Robert Redford or Jack Kennedy, as his photo ops would have the world believe. And now only Remo and Chiun could save the President from a free-form fiend who made bloodthirsty Aztec gods seem sweet and even the power of Sinanju helpless...
When a brilliant professor invents the world's first fantasy realization device, allowing anyone to watch their own secret fantasies on television, the Mafia are out to steal it, TV executives want to control it, and Remo and Chiun might be the only ones able to prevent it from killing everyone. As the death toll mounts, Remo, the Destroyer, and his teacher Chiun race to decipher the device's dangerous and deadly effects. But will the secret agents be able to resist the lethal temptation to watch their own secret fantasies?
Eager investors are buying up shares of an intrepid new company, which is cornering the market in international trade, financing and entertainment. Or to be specific: drugs, loan sharking and prostitution. The reinvented Mafia has incorporated, offering stock options, a Web Site and online trading.
The future is here, and Remo hates it. Mafia scum have burned down his house, Chiun isn't speaking to him and nobody is answering his ad for an assassin's apprentice. As an ambitious Don keeps one eye on the Dow, the suffering Dr. Harold Smith lovingly fingers his cyanide pill while the retiring U.S. President, in a departing "salute," puts CURE in the hangman's noose.
Remo is set to teach a few lessons in hospitality at Florida's top tourist attraction, but his mind is made up. He is a free agent. No more CURE, no more trying to solve America's problems.
But the nation goes into a state of shock when a Lee Harvey Oswald look-alike is nailed trying to shoot the President, and Remo can't ignore a sense of deja vu. Soon, a meddling television anchorwoman and strange transformations at the White House leave him feeling that he has landed in a role in a bizarre Hollywood Thriller
With the direct line to the President still dead, and Chiun trying to give away the secret of CURE, Remo and Smith are hard-pressed to protect the Man who threatened to shut down CURE for good...
When Captain Audion holds America hostage by jamming all television transmission and star news anchor Cheeta Ching is kidnapped, Remo must save the country by defeating Captain Audion and rescuing Cheeta.
A wave of global terrorism spreads as a result of one madman's tyrannical powers. Even while the governments of three major world powers are on his trail, CURE, the United States' top secret agency, knows of only one way to solve the problem - The Destroyer. There's little doubt that Master Chiun's protégé Remo Williams is capable of waging any war, but when the mysterious radical assassin is out to kill, everyone runs for cover - except the fearless and most powerful.
All over America the airline travelers were dying, seduced by lovely young women and strangled by silken scarves in savage hands. The security of the nation hung over an open grave - and Remo Williams, the Destroyer, and his oriental master and mentor Chiun, were ordered to slay the slayers and save the free world.
Little did Remo and Chiun suspect that their enemy was an ancient goddess who had a fifteen-hundred-year-old score to settle with Chiun. She commanded an army of youthful devotees and had the power to turn even Remo into her helpless slave. Now the Destroyer was being used for evil rather than good in an ultimate struggle between light and darkness that even Chiun feared he might not win...
When a diabolical superfoe acquires a superlaser that uses hypercolor to control emotion, he throws the world into a kaleidoscope of deadly mood swings. CURE goes on red alert.
And if things aren't black enough, a rival nation has seen the mind-blowing potential of beaming mood-altering color from satellites...and rendering entire nations defenseless.
Color them crazy, but Remo and Chiun know they've got to thwart this bizarre color scheme. More than ever before they must rely on their sensory skills honed to a razor sharpness - because the Destroyer is going to catch the enemy blindfolded.
Things weren't exactly looking bright for Remo and Chiun. Not to mention for the entire world. From an evil inferno the ancient almighty god of destruction had risen to possess the Destroyer's body and soul. Meanwhile Remo's Oriental master, Chiun had been betrayed by the U.S. President himself, and was now a weapon of the U.S.S.R. Smith, their unflappable superior in C.U.R.E., planned to take the easy way out-commit suicide. But for Remo and Chiun, the solution wasn't going to be quite so simple and not nearly as painless..
With voluptuous Pamela Thrushwell at his side, Remo punched out 242 on the machine, and saw the numbers replaced by letters "PLEASE TELL ME HOW WELL YOU DID." "We killed the man and the woman," said Remo. "YOU LIE. I CAN SEE YOU. YOU AND THE BIG-BREASTED BRIT TROUBLEMAKER," said the machine. "Take a hike," Remo said.
Suddenly the machine's cash drawer opened. A stack of hundred dollar bills appeared. "What's this for?" "FOR YOU. WHO ARE YOU? WHAT DO YOU WANT?" "To destroy you," Remo said. " I am coming to kill you." The machine blinked as if in some sort of insane joy. Then it flashed out:
"CONGRATULATIONS, WHOEVER YOU ARE. YOU ARE WORTH 50,000 POINTS."
Eldon Sluggard, the TV evangelist whose god was greed, had converted Remo to his renegade religion and enlisted him in his unholy war of conquest. Victoria Hoar, the curvaceous creature who made the minister her puppet by pulling his sexual strings, was out to turn Remo into a plaything of perpetual pleasure. The Destroyer was in the hands of this terrifying twosome body and soul, and unless his Oriental mentor Chiun could loosen their diabolical hold, Remo was going to hell in a hand basket-and taking the world with him...
The fat's in the fire when a Texas beef mogul is found skinned and gutted like one of his steers. Soon after, innocent people across the country are dying from eating meat injected with a powerful poison. Fearing a threat to national security, the White House orders Remo Williams, the Destroyer, to find the butchers and stop the killing. The grisly deaths are no mystery to Chiun, Remo's Sinanju master, but the work of an ancient Chinese vegetarian cult of murderers sworn to kill the meateaters of the West. Now the Destroyer's got to cut off the fanatics before they slaughter the U.S.!
Sultan Oman of Ebla is dying - and he plans to take the Great Satan with him by hitting America right in its nerve center: Hollywood.
So he buys a failing movie studio and dispatches the Mideast's top lethal terrorist to hire Tinseltown's most clueless producers to create the greatest battle epic ever. Thing is, the army of extras are real, the guns are loaded and the California freeway is jammed with camels and tanks.
On the other side of the world, Omay is poised to light the powder keg that will spell disaster.
The Destroyer races to save Hollywood, not for the sake of the free world, but because Chiun has just penned his screenplaym and nothing - especially not a madman - is about to keep him from the glory of an Oscar.
Remo Williams, aka The Destroyer, is being summoned to the nation's capital by the White House to expose a vicious plot to assassinate the President. The FBI and CIA are coming up empty in their investigation of a string of murderers of top executives around the country and now they need the special talents only The Destroyer can provide. Cutting to the core of the deadly conspiracy, Remo discovers a security leak on Capitol Hill itself and tightens his lethal noose. But, can he and Chiun, his Sinanju mentor, stop the killers before the President becomes the last corpse in the long line of The Head Men?
The Philosopher's Stone. The key to turning base metals into gold. Everyone knew it didn't exist. Except it did. And now the last of the alchemists, Harrison Caldwell, had his hands on it and was reaching out to grab the nuclear power that would fuel his dream for bottomless wealth-and create a golden age of hell on earth.
Only Remo and Chiun could stop him..if they could get past the army of the highest-paid killers on the globe..if they could survive the attacks of Francisco Braun, the golden-hairdo murderer, whose reputation for being the #1 assassin in his deadly trade was well earned..and if they could break the power of the magic metal that reduced governments to servants and turned even Remo Williams into its slave...
Thank's to Chiun's "emptying basin" technique, past U.S. presidents remember nothing about CURE, America's most secret defense organization. Now a former head of state believed to have lost his mind suddenly finds it - and calls Dr.Harold Smith to say hi. But before Remo and Chiun can redo their amnesia trick, the old guy is kidnapped by bumbling eco-terrorists eager to sell him to a desert despot with a grudge.
As the ex-Mr.President doggedly tries to outwit his captors and single-handedly save the Middle East from extinction, Remo and Chiun pick up the trail, and a worried Dr.Smith fingers his cyanide pill, convinced that this is the end. For Remo, it will be...unless Chiun drops the altitude he's adopted over a certain fiasco involving his Hollywood screenplay, and the world's most deadly assassin's end up killing each other before they can save anyone else.
The bodies of two murdered Israelis have turned up, hacked to bits and the pieces arranged in a bloody swastika - and Remo and Chiun are on their way to meet the leaders of an Israeli doomsday group, Zeher Lahurban. In the event of Israel losing the war with the Arabs, secretly stored atom bombs will drop on Arab territory. But a group of ex-Nazis discover the plan, and see a way to destroy the Jewish nation once and for all - without any help from the Arabs. Remo and Chiun are up against fanatics with long memories, who are keeping Hitler's schemes alive in their twisted minds.
A bigger chill than snow. Harder to kick than heroin.
The Destroyer was stoned on star lust. Remo was losing it...and loving it...in the highly-trained arms of Kim Kiley, Hollywood sex specialist...and the hottest weapon in the Wo family arsenal.
Okay, the House of Wo was steamed. But two thousand years was a long time to hold a grudge against the Destroyer. The Wos were like that, though. Give those guys a revenge motive, and it was carved in stone. The family stone. Where Prince Wo the Nearly Great had preprogrammed the Destroyer to self-destruct...unless Chiun could get his mind off sex and back onto violence where it belonged...