23
FOUR KINDS OF PIE
The mattress sank and squeaked, waking Grace with a start. Her eyes popped open; she was so tired it felt as if her eyelids were being dragged across sand.
She lifted onto her elbows and discovered Sam poised on the edge of her bed like Rodin’s Thinker.
“What is it?” she asked.
He glanced at her with red eyes. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Tell you about what?”
He drew back. “About Dad! He’s really not doing well at all.”
She shot up to sit. “Has anything happened?”
“Grace, he got lost!”
She dropped back against the pillows. Yesterday. “I was worried that something was going on now.”
“I didn’t realize it was this bad,” Sam said.
His words made her want to pull her hair out. Hadn’t he been reading her e-mails? Or listening during phone calls?
He sat up straighter. “I’ve made my decision, Grace. I’m coming home. For good.”
She tilted a skeptical glance at him.
“What?” he asked. “Why shouldn’t I?”
“Because you’d go crazy here, for one thing. And you and Dad don’t even get along all that well when you’re together. It’s not like you would be a soothing presence.”
“I’m bound to be better than this Darla What’s-Her-Name.”
“No, you won’t. Because she at least has training dealing with old people. She won’t start weeping when Dad forgets the word for broccoli.”
He looked offended. “That just took me by surprise.”
“All along, I’ve told you what’s been happening.”
“I know, but I didn’t expect him to have deteriorated so quickly. He even looks rumply. When was the last time he got his hair cut?”
“A few weeks ago. I don’t like to badger him. He really hates being nagged.”
“Tough. It’s for his own good.”
His imperious tone irked her. “He’s not a different person, Sam. He still has a will of his own.”
“If he’s the same person, I doubt he would want to look as if he slept in his clothes.” He shook his head. “Anyway, there’s no reason I can’t take care of him as well as anyone else. He’ll hate a home-care person, and you . . . well, you’ve already had your life screwed up completely by this.”
At that moment, Grace would have liked to whip the covers over her head and pretend to be invisible. She’d barely slept last night for chewing over what Ben had done. Now she had to deal with Sam envisioning himself as Florence Nightingale. And Thanksgiving. Why had she even woken up?
Sam glanced over at her, eyes narrowed and forehead scrunched. “Grace, you’re crumpling again.”
She sat up straighter. Poor Sam. She’d cried on Sam’s shoulder most of yesterday. “I just don’t know what I’m going to do now.”
“What do you mean? It’s decided. You’re going to go home and get back to your store and your friends and that other family in Oregon. I’m going to stay here.”
“You can’t, Sam. You have a fabulous job, a dream job. You would be wasted here. What would you do for work?”
He shrugged, but she could see the dread that lay behind his stoicism. “I’ll find something. I imagine I can land some local gig and write about city planning commissions and the school lunch menus.”
She shook her head. “There’s no point. We’ve got Darla. And even if you moved here and found a job, we’d still need her.” But in her mind, she was thinking, On the other hand, I could stay. “Anyway, you and Dad together are a train wreck.”
“That was before.” Her expression must have been doubtful, because he lifted his chin. “Look, I’ll prove it. You’ve got enough to do today. Let me take care of Dad.”
“Sam, Dad was looking forward to your visit so he could hang out with you. Not so you could harass him about his hair.”
“I know how to be tactful,” he said, growing as prickly as their father would have under the circumstances. “Besides, you’ve got enough to worry about with dinner.”
“That’s practically all done.”
He sent her an incredulous look. “You’ve mastered the art of cooking in your sleep?”
“I didn’t sleep. I got up in the middle of the night last night and loaded up the turkey. It’s already baking. In fact, it should be done soon.”
“A little early, isn’t it?”
“Better too soon than too late.” At least, that’s what she had been thinking at four in the morning. She went through the checklist in her head. “I made the cranberry sauce yesterday, and the stuffing is in with the turkey. The potatoes are peeled and sitting in water in the fridge, waiting to be boiled and mashed. Even the table is set.”
She needed to keep focused on today, minute by minute. If she ran out of tasks, she would just have to redo things she had already done. Mash potatoes into oblivion and reset the table until she fell into bed tonight in a stupor. Most of all, she needed to not think about Ben, or the fact that she was alone again and two years older than the last time she had had to date, and that she didn’t feel like dating at all because her life was unraveling at the seams. She didn’t even know the answers to the basics anymore—like where she belonged.
“I need to get up,” she said.
Sam was eyeing Egbert with horror. “What is that?”
Glancing at the silly melting smiley face immediately had the opposite effect on Grace. She grinned. “Egbert. He cheers me up.”
Sam’s gaze then fell on Heathcliff, who was crouched on one side of her in his brooding chicken pose. The flaps of fat at the bottom of his belly seeped away from him like a furry puddle. “Too bad the painting can’t do something for your cat. He does not look good. Do they make kitty amphetamines?”
“He’s just old.”
“Pathetically old. You should get him a friend or something.”
“He has a friend. She’s under the bed. She’s old, too.”
“Having an old friend under the bed probably doesn’t do him much good.”
“Those kitties are devoted to each other. The shelter I adopted them from said they couldn’t be separated. Heathcliff is probably just glad to know his old friend’s there.” She gave him a gentle nudge with a sheet-draped knee. “Kind of like having an old brother in Beirut.”
After Sam left her in peace so that she could get up and get dressed, she fought the urge to burrow under the covers and go back to sleep. She craved oblivion. But there was too much to do today to waste time wallowing in self pity. She sprang out of bed in the hope that brisk movement would bring on a more zippity-doo-dah outlook. The strategy worked—at least until the view of her closet stopped her cold. All her boring clothes.
No wonder Ben had dumped her.
After that, every routine seemed to contain a mental sand trap. In the bathroom mirror she noted blemishes that hadn’t been there before, and she began to wonder about teeth bleaching. Amber had perfect teeth.
Downstairs, Sam and Lou were already in a fracas over his record collection.
“They don’t need rearranging,” Lou was saying, his voice tense.
“But I could alphabetize them.”
“I don’t want them alphabetized! I want them where I can find them.”
She swerved away from the argument, but of course the idea of music made her start chewing over the possibilities for Rigoletto’s. If she did decide to stay in Austin permanently, what would become of the store, and its customers?
The trouble was, the thought of Rigoletto’s didn’t pain her like it had before. She didn’t feel the pull toward Portland that she had during the summer. Yet for so long, Rigoletto’s had been her baby, her life. Could she give that up for good?
In the kitchen she was surprised to find Dominic sitting alone at the table, staring intently at the salt and pepper shakers. Iago, obviously walked and fed, was under the table, his backside propped on one of Dominic’s sneakers. The dog looked up at Grace when she entered the room and smacked his jaws in greeting.
“Hey.” Dominic’s tone was somber.
“What’s going on?” she asked him. “Didn’t I see another car in front of your house?”
“My grandparents are here,” he said in a monotone.
“That’s great. Must be good to see them.”
“It’s awful,” he said. “I don’t think they even wanted to come—they just thought they had to. And now they’re acting as if everything is normal. Lily’s all dressed up and keeps trying to impress everybody, but nobody cares, and Jordan went to a friend’s house. Nobody mentions my mom’s name, or Nina’s. It’s like they’re trying to pretend they never existed. Sometimes I even wonder myself, except they had to have existed or I wouldn’t feel this way, would I?”
“What way?”
“Like someone hit my chest with a rock.” He started fiddling with the salt and pepper shakers.
And she thought she had problems. She sank down in a chair. “Did . . . your mom always do a lot for the holidays?” She’d almost referred to her as Jennifer, as if they’d been acquainted. After hearing Ray talk about her, Grace did feel like she knew her. A little.
“From Halloween on, Mom was always busy,” he said. “Before Thanksgiving she made food for days. I’d help her sometimes. We ate leftovers for a week afterward. Last year was really great. Nina and I made three kinds of pie, and then Granny Kate brought a pineapple chess pie, so we had four. Just the pies took up a whole counter. It was crazy. This year Granny Kate brought two, but Jordan stole one.”
“That’s awful!”
“And now when I’m in the kitchen and I look at the one sorry pie, I keep thinking about last year. I can’t help it. Last year was so much better—we had everything.”
She nodded. Poor Dominic. To lose so much, so young. She couldn’t imagine how he felt.
He sighed and stood up. “I have to go back.”
“Come over later, if you have time. Dad will probably be glad for a rest from Sam and Steven and me.”
After he’d left, she got up to check the oven. There was shouting in the next room.
A moment later, Sam skittered in as if he’d been ejected from the living room by a boot to the rear. “Some people just refuse to be helped!” he snapped.
“Not me,” she assured him. “You can help me by hauling this turkey out of the oven.”
He did as he was told, donning oven mitts and then wincing under the weight of the bird as he pulled the rack out. “What’s this stuffed with? Gravel?”
She laughed. “I hope not. But I’m never thinking my clearest at four A.M.
A car door slammed outside and Iago let out several sharp barks.
“That might be Emily,” Grace said. “I should go see.”
“Who’s Emily?”
She was already on the way out of the kitchen, although she nearly bumped into her dad on the way through. “I think someone’s here.”
“I know, Dad. I’m heading for the door.”
“What’s going on in here?” Lou asked, gaping at the opened oven. “Why is Sam taking the turkey out already?”
“Because it’s done, Dad,” Sam said.
“We’re not about to eat, are we?”
“It doesn’t matter. You can’t let it sit in an oven forever or it will have the consistency of shoe leather.”
She left Sam to sort out the turkey situation with their father and ran to the front door.
The new arrival was only Steven. He smiled, holding up a foil-covered platter.
“Where’s Emily?” Grace asked.
“She couldn’t make it. She sent along something for us, though.”
As the arguing from the kitchen ramped up into shouting, Grace peeled back the foil on the plate Steven was holding, revealing a festive ring of three-colored, wriggling Jell-O. “This is really weird. Did I miss the memo on the retro Jell-O revival?”
Steven frowned. “What are they yelling about in there?”
Grace waved her free hand as she took the plate from him. “Don’t mind them. They’ve been spatting all mor—”
A clattering crash from the kitchen cut her words short, and was followed by Sam’s voice, yelling, “Oh, great! Just great!”
Steven and Grace hurried toward the kitchen.
Shoulders and heads bowed, Sam and Lou were standing in the middle of the kitchen in a puddle of turkey juice, which Iago was frantically lapping up as fast as he could. The turkey itself was sprawled on its side on the floor, looking like a crime victim with its stuffing guts spilling out over the linoleum.
“This could be a problem,” Sam observed.