XXI
In Oxford Street
“IN GOING DOWNSTAIRS THE first time I found an
unexpected difficulty because I could not see my feet; indeed I
stumbled twice, and there was an unaccustomed clumsiness in
gripping the bolt. By not looking down, however, I managed to walk
on the level passably well.
“My mood, I say, was one of exaltation. I felt as a
seeing man might do, with padded feet and noiseless clothes, in a
city of the blind. I experienced a wild impulse to jest, to startle
people, to clap men on the back, fling people’s hats astray, and
generally revel in my extra-ordinary advantage.
“But hardly had I emerged upon Great Portland
Street, however (my lodging was close to the big draper’s
shopkq
there), when I heard a clashing concussion and was hit violently
behind, and turning saw a man carrying a basket of soda-water
syphons, and looking in amazement at his burden. Although the blow
had really hurt me, I found something so irresistible in his
astonishment that I laughed aloud. ‘The devil’s in the basket,’ I
said, and suddenly twisted it out of his hand. He let go
incontinently,kr and
I swung the whole weight into the air.
“But a fool of a cabman, standing outside a public
house,ks made
a sudden rush for this, and his extending fingers took me with
excruciating violence under the ear. I let the whole down with a
smash on the cabman, and then, with shouts and the clatter of feet
about me, people coming out of shops, vehicles pulling up, I
realised what I had done for myself, and cursing my folly, backed
against a shop window and prepared to dodge out of the confusion.
In a moment I should be wedged into a crowd and inevitably
discovered. I pushed by a butcher boy, who luckily did not turn to
see the nothingness that shoved him aside, and dodged behind the
cabman’s four-wheeler. I do not know how they settled the business.
I hurried straight across the road, which was happily clear, and
hardly heeding which way I went, in the fright of detection the
incident had given me, plunged into the afternoon throng of Oxford
Street.
“I tried to get into the stream of people, but they
were too thick for me, and in a moment my heels were being trodden
upon. I took to the gutter, the roughness of which I found painful
to my feet, and forthwith the shaft of a crawling hansomkt dug
me forcibly under the shoulder blade, reminding me that I was
already bruised severely. I staggered out of the way of the cab,
avoided a perambulatorku by a
convulsive movement, and found myself behind the hansom. A happy
thought saved me, and as this drove slowly along I followed in its
immediate wake, trembling and astonished at the turn of my
adventure. And not only trembling, but shivering. It was a bright
day in January and I was stark naked and the thin slime of mud that
covered the road was freezing. Foolish as it seems to me now, I had
not reckoned that, transparent or not, I was still amenablekv to
the weather and all its consequences.
“Then suddenly a bright idea came into my head. I
ran round and got into the cab. And so, shivering, scared, and
sniffing with the first intimations of a cold, and with the bruises
in the small of my back growing upon my attention, I drove slowly
along Oxford Street and past Tottenham Court Road. My mood was as
different from that in which I had sallied forth ten minutes ago as
it is possible to imagine. This invisibility indeed! The one
thought that possessed me was—how was I to get out of the scrape I
was in.
“We crawled past Mudie‘s,kw and
there a tall woman with five or six yellow-labelled books hailed my
cab, and I sprang out just in time to escape her, shaving a railway
van narrowly in my flight. I made off up the roadway to Bloomsbury
Square, intending to strike north past the museumkxand
so get into the quiet district. I was now cruelly chilled, and the
strangeness of my situation so unnerved me that I whimpered as I
ran. At the northward corner of the Square a little white dog ran
out of the Pharmaceutical Society‘s1 offices,
and incontinently made for me, nose down.
“I had never realised it before, but the nose is to
the mind of a dog what the eye is to the mind of a seeing man. Dogs
perceive the scent of a man moving as men perceive his vision. This
brute began barking and leaping, showing, as it seemed to me, only
too plainly that he was aware of me. I crossed Great Russell
Street, glancing over my shoulder as I did so, and went some way
along Montague Street before I realised what I was running
towards.
“Then I became aware of a blare of music, and
looking along the street saw a number of people advancing out of
Russell Square, red shirts, and the banner of the Salvation
Army2 to the
fore. Such a crowd, chanting in the roadway and scoffing on the
pavement, I could not hope to penetrate, and dreading to go back
and farther from home again, and deciding on the spur of the
moment, I ran up the white steps of a house facing the museum
railings, and stood there until the crowd should have passed.
Happily the dog stopped at the noise of the band too, hesitated,
and turned tail, running back to Bloomsbury Square again.
“On came the band, bawling with unconscious irony
some hymn about ‘When shall we see his Face?’ and it seemed an
interminable time to me before the tide of the crowd washed along
the pavement by me. Thud, thud, thud, came the drum with a
vibrating resonance, and for the moment I did not notice two
urchins stopping at the railings by me. ‘See ’em,‘ said one. ’See
what?‘ said the other. ’Why—them footmarks—bare. Like what
you makes in mud.‘
“I looked down and saw the youngsters had stopped
and were gaping at the muddy footmarks I had left behind me up the
newly whitened steps. The passing people elbowed and jostled them,
but their confounded intelligence was arrested. ‘Thud, thud, thud,
When, thud, shall we see, thud, his Face, thud, thud.’ ‘There’s a
barefoot man gone up them steps, or I don’t know nothing,’ said
one. ‘And he ain’t never come down again. And his foot was
a-bleeding.’
“The thick of the crowd had already passed. ‘Looky
there, Ted,’ quoth the younger of the detectives, with the
sharpness of surprise in his voice, and pointed straight to my
feet. I looked down and saw at once the dim suggestion of their
outline sketched in splashes of mud. For a moment I was
paralysed.
“ ‘Why, that’s rum,’ said the elder. ‘Dashed rum!
It’s just like the ghost of a foot, ain’t it?’ He hesitated and
advanced with outstretched hand. A man pulled up short to see what
he was catching, and then a girl. In another moment he would have
touched me. Then I saw what to do. I made a step, the boy started
back with an exclamation, and with a rapid movement I swung myself
over into the porticoky of
the next house. But the smaller boy was sharp-eyed enough to follow
the movement, and before I was well down the steps and upon the
pavement, he had recovered from his momentary astonishment and was
shouting out that the feet had gone over the wall.
“They rushed round and saw my new footmarks flash
into being on the lower step and upon the pavement. ‘What’s up?’
asked someone. ‘Feet! Look! Feet running!’ Everybody in the road,
except my three pursuers, was pouring along after the Salvation
Army, and this blow not only impeded me but them. There was an eddy
of surprise and interrogation. At the cost of bowling over one
young fellow I got through, and in another moment I was rushing
headlong round the circuit of Russell Square, with six or seven
astonished people following my footmarks. There was no time for
explanation, or else the whole host would have been after me.
“Twice I doubled round corners, thrice I crossed
the road and came back on my tracks, and then, as my feet grew hot
and dry, the damp impressions began to fade. At last I had a
breathing space and rubbed my feet clean with my hands, and so got
away altogether. The last I saw of the chase was a little group of
a dozen people perhaps, studying with infinite perplexity a slowly
drying footprint that had resulted from a puddle in Tavistock
Square,—a footprint as isolated and incomprehensible to them as
Crusoe’s solitary discovery.3
“This running warmed me to a certain extent, and I
went on with a better courage through the maze of less frequented
roads that runs hereabouts. My back had now become very stiff and
sore, my tonsils were painful from the cabman’s fingers, and the
skin of my neck had been scratched by his nails; my feet hurt
exceedingly and I was lame from a little cut on one foot. I saw in
time a blind man approaching me, and fled limping, for I feared his
subtle intuitions. Once or twice accidental collisions occurred and
I left people amazed, with unaccountable curses ringing in their
ears. Then came something silent and quiet against my face, and
across the Square fell a thin veil of slowly falling flakes of
snow. I had caught a cold, and do as I would I could not avoid an
occasional sneeze. And every dog that came in sight, with its
pointing nose and curious sniffing, was a terror to me.
“Then came men and boys running, first one and then
others, and shouting as they ran. It was a fire. They ran in the
direction of my lodging, and looking. back down a street I saw a
mass of black smoke streaming up above the roofs and telephone
wires. It was my lodging burning; my clothes, my apparatus, all my
resources indeed, except my cheque-book and the three volumes of
memoranda that awaited me in Great Portland Street, were there.
Burning! I had burnt my boatskz—if
ever a man did! The place was blazing.”
The Invisible Man paused and thought. Kemp glanced
nervously out of the window. “Yes?” he said. “Go on.”